Marriage Chronicles: Backyard Date!

Hey everybody! Is it just me or is this year ZOOMING by? I cannot believe it’s already July. Where has the time gone? Well, my family just had our summer staycation and I certainly wish it was much longer. Be honest, if you have children, does it seem like your vacation is still just WORK? I mean I adore my (big) angels but cooking and serving folks don’t really seem like a vacay to me. To get away, the hubby and I frequent our backyard where we hang out until the weee hours in the morning in a screened tent strung with bistro lights. Basic yes, but I swear it seems to transport us. We have the best conversations there and I’ve grown to long for our Friday Nights in the tent.

While on vacay, we went to two restaurants and I must say I was extremely underwhelmed by the food. I don’t know if being on lockdown and preparing our own “restaurant” food at home has something to do with it but I found myself constantly tweaking the food and service in my head. Soooooo one day I decided to just plan a nice date night in our backyard to provide the service I think we both deserved in our favorite Friday night location.

I used items I had on hand at the house to pull off this casual chic tablescape. It was crisp enough to feel special but so laid back and comfortable. White cotton tablecloth, ivory and black napkins, black candle holders and black stoneware dishes. If you asked for one tip to romance -up a table, I would tell you to use candles. Candles are special.

We began with some light nibbles and cocktails. I grabbed some mozzarella and cheese wrapped in prosciutto, olives and cut up a baguette loaf for dipping. Just enough to enjoy before and after dinner.

Hubby had a craving for fried fish and grits so we added some asparagus to shuzh it up a bit. I also added chopped scallions to my grits for drama. lololol. This is backyard comfort food at its finest!

We finished our meal with a champagne toast and some cheesecake, then we talked until the candles burned out.

I really enjoy his company and I’m so glad we have our sweet Friday nights. I know I’m going to do dates like this more often because we had such a nice time. My goal going forward is to create a home and a life I don’t need a vacation from. One step at a time.

Until next time,

-K

The ABC’s of Baby Showering!

Hey there!  I hope everyone is doing well! I tell ya, I had a blast this past weekend showering my niece and nephew at their Baby Shower.  My niece is like my daughter, and when she said “I need you to come over I have an announcement” …. I was already planning her shower.  She is so much fun and one of the few people that let me totally be myself creatively. And so, it began!!!

Now, my niece is not the typical girly girl.  She does not care for the color pink, has a head full of fiery red dreadlocks, loves gardens and Farmer’s Markets, and has a thing for peacock feathers.  She’s bubbly and serious, she’s elegant and bohemian, loves the peace of crystals and sage, but she’s always strapped which should make for an interesting evening.  Soooo if you’re a DIY person like myself, I thought it would be useful for me to share my 7 steps for outlining the perfect Baby Shower event.

 Event Concept and Description                                

When planning begins, I like to sit down and chat about likes, dislikes and any must haves for the day. I think about how the event should feel and the mood of the atmosphere.  This plays a huge part in helping your vision come to life as you tie in all the other details and projects for the event.

Invitations and Paper Goods                                     

The invitations are really what gives guests the first glimpse of the event’s theme. I love this part especially for Nygeria’s shower because we didn’t go with your typical baby themes like booties or bows.  We wanted her love for crystals and peacock feathers to shine through.

 Other paper items like the party favors we had also followed that same theme.  To capture more of her personality, we put together a sage bundle and matches, rose quartz stone, and a bracelet with the tree of life charm for her favor boxes.  We also included a note that tells the meaning of them all.  To bring out her earthy elegance, we adorned the kraft colored boxes with a satin purple bow and a peacock feather.

Tables and Seating                                         

The tables and seating are another area you can really show your personality.  Guests spend the most time here, so you want to make it interesting and give them something to awe over.  If possible, I try to always use real flowers for centerpieces.  You never get tired of looking at beautiful nature-made real flowers.  This elevates your tablescape instantly.  For Nygeria’s day we included metal prisms, crystals, geode slices, natural colored baby blocks, and candles.  We also included plates and cutlery in the tablescape with a personalized touch to the napkin holders that were extremely inexpensive. My favorite thing was the geometrically shaped cups.  Such a unique touch.

Buffet

If you decide on a buffet, its so important not to neglect this area.  You want to be sure it ties into your other décor even though it may not be as heavily decorated as other areas.  Another important factor is that you allow ample spacing for lines of people.  I know I hate it when I’m at my seat and people are hovering near me waiting in the buffet line.  Be sure you think about everyone’s comfort level.

Focal Point 1 – Cake/Dessert Table                                         

If there is space, I like to have several focal points to create areas of interest throughout the venue.  The cake/dessert table is certainly one area that does double duty. Not only is it necessary, it can also serve as a focal point if the décor is played up a bit.  For Nygeria’s event, we used a backdrop similar to her photo backdrop to add to the décor of the table but not take away from the beauty of the cake.      

Focal Point 2 - Backdrop/Photo Area                                     

This area is where you can have the most fun. It’s the area that anchors the room and where you can really be most creative.  Have fun with this because this is visual you will see in all the pictures posted on social media and other places. Make it whimsical and full of life.  For Nygeria’s shower, we included some balloon garland, a decorated bassinet, and baby Ellarhi’s name.  There are several professionals that are available locally but if you choose to diy it like me, YouTube is going to be your best friend in creating balloon art like this one.  It’s not perfect but I love how it turned out.

Music/Activity                                 

For smaller events where you don’t use a DJ, I like to put together a playlist.  Most of the time it’s jazz because there is already so much talking during parties and who wants to compete with singing.  Jazz is an easy option, but it is totally up to the guest of honor and the theme of the occasion. Lastly, think about how the time will be spent.  Will you have games or a specific activity that will occupy your guests time? Be specific in how the day will flow so you know what happens next. This is important especially when you want to hold their attention. 

Thanks for listening and I hope you’ll find these tidbits useful.

Until next time,

-K

TGH Tips: Crowd Pleasers for your next Get Together!

I’m an old fashioned girl and I love to have “company coming” so naturally I used to go overboard in over cleaning and over cooking. I end up tired, rushing, and snapping at my family because things aren’t coming out just perfect! Now that getting together has been a bit modified, I’ve enjoyed the smaller, more intimate groups. I’m more relaxed and trying to calm my perfectionist tendencies by making crowd pleasers as opposed to full blown 4-course meal productions.

I’ve come up with three items that seem to be crowd favorites anytime we have people over. Not only do they make your life much easier, anyone can master putting them together!

The Signature Drink

Whiskey Blue - From my 44th Birthday!

My absolute favorite is the Signature Drink. Let’s be honest , the only reason I love this so much is because you can come up with cool unique names and make them pretty with garnish. No, you don’t have to be some experienced bartender to pull this off. Experiment! It can be as elaborate as some recipe you find on pinterest or as simple as pouring a pre-mixed drink into a nice dispenser and call it something cute! This takes the guess work out of trying to accommodate several different requests and it saves you a ton of money when buying alcohol!

The Charcuterie Tray

The next Gracious Hostess hack is the Charcuterie tray. What?? Say it with me …. Shar-koo-tuh-ree. This is your basic meat, cheese, and cracker tray but fancy. I live for a good faux fancy moment. The formula I use for this is to get a basic and bougie for each item. Say you have meat, cheese, fruit and crackers. An example would be to use pepperoni slices as my basic and a bougie example would be something like prosciutto. A basic could be plain cheddar,bougie could be brie. A basic fruit could be dried apricots and bougie could be dried figs. And last, our basic club cracker could go up against a bougie pita chip. This way you have something for the most primitive to the most sophisticated of palates.

A Hearty Salad

Last we have the magical menu stretcher! The hearty salad! I love a good salad. It makes me feel like I’m eating healthy (as I chuckle). They have the ability to stretch your menu because depending on how robust you make it, its totally filling. This particular one seems to disappear everytime we have guests. I went to Zoe’s Kitchen and fell in love with their Greek salad. Now we all know that Zoe’s Kitchen is real proud of their food judging by the price, so naturally my pockets couldn’t sustain my addiction. I decided to make it myself. I did have to modify the ingredients according to tastes of my household members but we love it. The ingredients are simple:

• Romaine Lettuce - Do not buy pre-chopped lettuce. Get the whole lettuce heads and chop them yourself. They usually come three to a pack. You will regret it if you don’t.

• Cucumbers - I take a regular cucumber and slice it, then slice again into quarters for more bite sized pieces.

• Cherry Tomatoes - Do not cut the tomatoes. Use them whole. It will shock you how long the salad stays fresh compared to when you cut up the tomatoes. The inside of the tomatoes will breakdown the salad quickly. I tend to look for the smallest cherry or grape tomatoes I can find.

• Kalamata Olives - For punch and flavor. Be sure you get the pitted olives. There is nothing worse than dealing with seeds mid-bite!

• Crumbled Feta Cheese - To finish it off add the crumbled feta. I have also used the feta block and cut it but it seems that the chunks were too big and gave you a mouthful of cheese and nothing else. Find the crumbled and make your life easier.

I always pair this salad with the Olive Garden dressing. You’ll thank me later.

Alright, now that I’ve shared these get-together hacks with you, go on and be your best Faux Fancy Self!

Until next time,

-K

Tips from the Gracious Hostess: Three Reasons Why You Don't need to Hire an Event Professional

Hey there! Can we talk?? I was asked recently why I haven’t been planning events lately, and of course they were referring to our pre-pandemic days. I paused and was going to give some text book professional answer but on this day I had TIME. Instead I said “Honestly? People don’t want to pay you what you’re worth!”. She gave me the biggest grin and said “OMG! We stay trying to hustle somebody for a deal!”

So this piece goes out to all the Creative Professionals, Event Planners, Event Decorators, Caterers, Photographers, DJ’s and anybody else who can relate. In my journey as an Event Planner, I have had more than my fair share of wasted consultations, can I get a hook up, I want the red carpet but I can only afford a red throw rug type of inquiries. On January 1, 2018 I began to officially turn down business. I was done wasting my time. I have a full time job already so anything on top of that is a luxury. Every so often I feel generous and do things out of kindness but people seriously don’t understand what goes into planning and executing an event. Sooooooo, I have come up with three helpful tips to remind you when you DO NOT need to hire an Event Professional.

1. When Your Budget is Struggling

   I’m a very visually inspired person so I know and love the appeal of having an event so perfectly curated with whimsy that its a thrill to attend. I love it! BUT if you are penny pinching, please have realistic expectations on what you expect to receive. When you hire the professional you’re paying for their creativity, time, labor, logistics, and their team of helpers. After you get through that list, then you begin to touch on costs for your actual event supplies and props. This is the reason the rates are pretty elevated. You’re paying for the convenience of letting a professional handle the event. When you shrink the budget or short change your professional, you are compromising their reputation and the outcome of your event. When people ask who decorated they immediately associate what they see with the abilities of the decorator. They never think “oh well maybe the budget was inadequate”. This is the main reason I say no. We are only as good as the budget you provide. I can’t risk my reputation any longer. Been there, done that, too many times. I would rather throw my own events for publicity then accept an event that is under budget. Please think twice before wasting that professionals time if you know you really can’t afford that dream event. There are several other routes you can take and cut out the middle man which saves your budget. Hmmm maybe that will be my next blog post.

2. When You Must be Involved in Every Creative Detail

   You’ve hired your professional right? You’re excited! Now you inquire daily on progress and schedules and budget and whatever. THIS IS ANNOYING! This actually stifles the creative process. You’re paying us for our creativity and expertise. It’s perfectly normal to meet and talk about what you would like to see for your event, but once you both have an understanding of what those expectations are let the creative juices flow. The more changes, additions, and redirection that occurs, the less we’re able to do our job successfully. If you want the best product, you have to allow the professional room to make decisions that work best for the space and the budget you’ve provided.

3. When You Have the Talent and the Time

   This is exactly how I got started in the event decor arena. If you have a knack for making things pretty, you’re organized and enjoy doing this type of stuff, why on earth would you hire someone so you can question every decision they make secretly thinking…”I could have done that!” Don’t waste your money on a planner if you can totally handle pulling together an event that’s just as great. Especially if you are guilty of numbers 1. and 2. Take your time, pace yourself, do your research and execute your plan. There are tons of resources and inspiration online, especially Pinterest and YouTube. I do have another piece of advice though, DO NOT experiment with extremely large or significant events like weddings. Leave that to the professionals.

There you have it. Thanks for listening to me rant and I hope this shed a little light on how to approach the idea of hiring any event professional. It doesn’t take a huge budget to pull off a nice event but be clear and upfront about your budget and your expectations to create a positive experience you and your hired talent.

Until next time,

-K