It’s the holiday season! The season for giving, family, gratefulness, kindness, gatherings filled with love and bliss. Right? Well for an introverted extrovert like myself, you may want to add anxiety, stress and feelings of failure to that mix. Let me start by saying there is nothing I look forward to most than to see and be with my loved ones this time of year and I wouldn’t change it for the world. However, knowing my personality, I would be a fool to not be honest and come up with some coping mechanisms for what is bound to consume me.
Odd Bird
See, I’m a bit of an odd bird. A self-soother. My sister and I are five years apart so growing up I’ve become accustomed to entertaining myself at times while still getting a healthy dose of playtime with her, my other siblings, and the 8 million cousins we also have. So, to create balance, I would give 200% effort while together hoping that somehow this would justify granting myself some alone time to recuperate. Sounds pretty logical right? Yeah, I thought so too.
Reality Hits
Fast forward to marriage, kids, nieces, nephews, siblings, aging parents, aging grandparents, friends, family from afar, and all the Scott, Coffee, Watson, and McDowell branches of my family tree. The children keep multiplying and I don’t even know the names of them all. I just match them up according to familiar facial features (lolololol). If this sounds vaguely familiar to you, I’m here to let you know YOU ARE NOT ALONE. And this is a wonderful problem to have.
My Bright Idea
This is where the anxiety, stress and feelings of failure come in. It’s quite overwhelming trying to fit all of that into the last month and a half of the year. So, I’ve concluded that I should stop trying to cram a years-worth of love into a month. Spread it throughout the year. You don’t need December to tell you to spread cheer. I like cheer in February and March too. I figured if I made a good effort throughout the year, I wouldn’t feel like I’ve failed or disappointed someone if I missed them at the end of the year.
Give Me a Break
I’m sure I’m not the only one looking for ways to remedy the holiday guilt so join me and try really hard to reach out to those you love often but don’t forget to cut yourself a break. Don’t be so hard on yourself when you can’t accommodate everyone. There’s nothing I love more than a shady comment from someone who “loves” you saying they haven’t seen or heard from you…... Well petty, immature, defensive Kim still lives here, and she would say “I don’t see you blowing up my phone or beating down my door either!”
Seriously though, be patient and kind to each other and understand we all carry a great amount of life’s burdens. Be considerate in your expectations of others and enjoy your life. Not just the Holidays.
Until next time,
-K